Dirtection Inc: episode 7

In which the Secret Service gets to grips with bonkers boffins and hallucinogenic horseflies.

Dirtection Inc: episode 6

In which the vicar delivers a sermon and the rogue cleaning operative delivers the coup de grace.
The keyboard cleaning profession seldom takes one into ecclesiastical circles, so I’m not sure if it is considered normal for vicars to sit stark naked upon gargoyles while delivering sermons through a megaphone.

Dirtection Inc: episode 5

In which our hero worries about elephants, spiders, fairy cakes and the tomatoes of wrath...

Dirtection Inc: episode 4

In which a bit of fluff leads to a deadly encounter...

Dirtection Inc: episode 1

There are 322 types of keyboard fluff. This is the story of one of them.

If it hadn’t been for the piece of fluff, the whole business with the horseflies, the vicar and the postmistress might have turned out very differently. It was a particularly interesting piece of fluff, as it happens, which is why I stole it. Well, I’m not sure ‘steal’ is quite the right word, really. More a case of borrowing. I would have given it back if asked. But, as is so often the case with fluff, nobody asked.

Dirtection Inc: episode 3

In which a bit of fluff yields up its terrible secret!

Ethel works in Admin. I generally see her at 11 o’clock in the morning and half-past three in the afternoon. We meet by the drinks machine in the foyer of Building C. The machine dispenses a tasteless brown liquid

Dirtection Inc: episode 2

fluff-headerThe secret history of fluff - now it’s war...
People often ask me if it’s boring. The job, I mean – cleaning other people’s computers. “Boring?” I say,
“Is white-water rafting boring? Is tightrope walking over Niagara Falls boring? Is swimming naked with man-eating sharks boring?” If they are being honest, they generally say “No,” or “Probably not”. At which point I snap my fingers, affect a smirk of superiority and say, “Pah! Dull as dishwater compared to cleaning computers!”